Why do you want to divorce your wife?
- She smokes in bed!
- Well,that`s not a reason for divorce.
- Yes,but also she likes to use my ear as an ashtray!!!
Your husband needs complete rest, – doctor cays to a woman. – Here is the prescription for sleeping pills.
- How often does he have to take them,doctor?
- No sleeping pills are for you,so he can have rest.
My wife wants to lose some weight,so she is doing a lot of horse riding.
- And,what are the results?
- For one week horse lost 20 pounds.
Wife argue with husband:
- You can`t choose what car to buy almost for five months!!! And when we start dating,you proposed to me after just one week!!!
- Darling,you can`t compare this kind of things. Choosing the car – it is very important matter!!!
70 year old man asked his wife.
Do you feel sad when u see me running behind young girls?
Wife: No not at all, even dogs chase cars but they can’t drive it.

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